Useless CDs

Wither thou goest, Useless CDs feature on The 21 Gun Salute? Thou art here again!

I finally moved apartments. Part of my whole reason for doing Useless CDs was to give each CD a proper send-off before I gave it to iPodmeister.com in exchange for an iPad. During this process, 2 things happened:

1. I realized that I actually still want to keep my CDs, bc I feel like I will still want them at some point down the road, I don't know, to give to my kids or something? It's not rational.

2. I realized that in order to get an iPad for my CDs I would need to give them like 800, and I can only muster like 250. So... yeah.



RIO BAILE FUNK "FAVELA BOOTY BEATS"


I stand by what I wrote before about Baile Funk. It is unlistenable garbage. Then again, you're not really supposed to put it on in the background while you listen to NPR and make old man tea:

woodysfavoritetea.jpg

Nope, you're only really supposed to listen to it at deafening volumes while you're sweating your face off in a Scion-sponsored rave in Miami. Otherwise it becomes an unbearable listening experience. It's akin to hearing airhorns. Is it fun to hear an airhorn in a live DJ set? Yes. Would you listen to a CD full of airhorns? No. Does likening Baile Funk to unlistenable garbage make me a racist? Yes, but this is not new.

BEST SONG: Popozuda Rock'n'roll



BEST OF THE TOADIES



Ha ha, I have this, and by that I mean, YES I have this. (fist pump) I love the Toadies' first album so much I went to see older, balder Toadies perform it pretty much in its entirety (along with the requisite new songs) 2 years ago. What sticks in my brain is how totally indebted to the Pixies they are. The weird time signatures, gothic/dark/water based/religious lyrical themes, screamy voice/singing voice stuff are all there. And I truly think the Toadies were a cut above the rest of the 90s ilk. Toadies, Elastica, Pulp. Anyone else?



YO LA TENGO "GENIUS + LOVE"


Ask me how many times I listened to this. Ask! The answer is zero. I like how YLT are famous/proud for being the world's oldest, ugliest band of old ugly men and one ugly woman. Not to say that I don't like Yo La Tengo. "Our Way To Fall" is beautiful and touching, as is "Autumn Sweater" and about 100 other songs by them. Anyways, I don't really have anything bad to say about YLT. I like them, given half a chance!



ROD LEE VOL 1: OPERATION START-UP


Yikes. See above re: this shit is no fun to listen to at home, but fun to listen to live? Now that I write it out the answer is still no. Bmore is fucking terrible to listen to live. I like it when you throw it in there in a party set then dip out of it, but to hear Sing Sing drums for 20 minutes is unbearable. The Highs and Mids on those drums are fucking ear-splitting! Bmore house in the house!



DAVID BANNER CERTIFIED


I never listened to this. I got it for free. But David Banner "Like A Pimp" is the best song in creation, as is "Play" if for no other reason than its boner-inducing video. I would have put it on the Top 10 Boner Givingest Music Videos Of All Time, except for the fact that, like all bad porn, you will just begin to get a boner and then look at Banner's hideous grill-faced mug.

"Full stop. Both machines."
-Joe Matt



Also, David Banner reading the generic "BUSINESS" section of a newspaper = LOL. Move over 50!

 
 
 
 

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